mardi 18 août 2015

I’m not sure which is worse: intense feeling, or the absence of it


           Do you know what’s worse than feeling sad ? it’s feeling nothing  , feeling numb ( jealousy , love , hate … those don’t exist anymore. It’s so scary when you can’t know what you really  want. you try to figure out  what is this hole inside of your heart sucking every single emotion out of it  but you just can’t . You Not  happy but happy at the same time because  you don’t have any  reason not to    . you feel so tired and exited about what’s gonna happen at the same time . I complicate things maybe? But i know someone over there is struggling with the same thing .I have such a huge emptiness  right now and there's still this heavy load on my chest that won't let me breath right.... Gosh... WHATS MISSING???? I wish I could know how to stop this …..
 And I’m just here. Sitting. Thinking.
I know someone is reading this and that’s quite a  relief for me , so thank you
good night xxx